Not sure what’s in the air these days, but I’ve been getting BUSTED by some men in my life! (Not dating wise, but on the business front, LOL!)

It comes from my renewed commitment to really uplevel my game. So between attending the David Neagle event and joining the local Glazer-Kennedy mastermind group, I recently encountered 3 men who showed me some places where I was holding on to some old, limiting beliefs and where my mindset wasn’t serving me.

It has caused shifts in my mindset and awareness, and it comes from a bit of butt kicking by some folks who saw something that was in my blind spot. Of course I have to laugh, because isn’t that what I teach? Yeah. That’s how it goes. You move forward, and then there’s more to see and be.

I’ll tell you my story about discovering something that I was working so hard to NOT BE and the cost of that and how it came out in my Mastermind meeting. Then we are going to look at your life and business to see who you are being, or not being. Why? Because if you aren’t putting yourself out in the world in the biggest way possible, you are losing business, money, and all that goes along with it. You can’t expect to hide out and be on top of your game if you have a business that sells YOU as part of it.

Here I was, all prepared to tell my mastermind peeps what I’d done with some new leads, and what I had planned for the next quarter of 2011. But even before I got 10 minutes into my hot seat moment, they noticed something and called me on it. Ok, gotta say that I was a bit embarrassed because this was such a HUGE blind spot for me, but I don’t pay to be in this group of super-marketers to have ‘em take care of my feelings and play nice! I pay to get the truth and their expertise, so when all of them pointed something out….I listened.

Let me tell you a bit of back story first –

In my time being in this business, I have encountered some amazing coaches and mentors. And there have been some that do business in a way that makes me sick. Who they are on the outside is nothing like who they are in reality. And what happens? Clients get hurt. People are lied to. Money is lost. Now normally I’m very positive and see good and light in all, but in the case where people are being exploited, it makes me nuts! So I think I have turned into the caped crusader of the anti-sleazy marketer. Don’t quite have the cape and all, but it really feels like I’m on a mission to be real, tell the truth, and legitimately do what I can do to support people versus just make empty promises.

But what I didn’t know is just how much energy I have around this. Sure…my ‘good guy’ colleagues and I often talk about how we want to create a new wave of trust and credibility in the internet marketing world. But little did I know that how I saw it and how my Mastermind peers saw me with it was a big difference!

As I was sharing with the Mastermind Group, they stopped me in my tracks and said this:

“Therese, do you know how much time and energy and conversation you put into NOT being a sleazy marketer? Do you see that you are missing opportunities because you are NOT wanting to be ‘like them’ and so you don’t stand up?”

Dang. I had to admit they were right.

Basically they pointed out that by NOT being “like them,” I’m also not owning marketing my own stuff because I’m so careful to NOT be like that and offend anyone.

Wowza. I had no idea that the thing I was running from was very likely influencing the success I can achieve.

You see, you can’t fight against something while trying to bring something else in. I could take the lesson from Mother Teresa who said, “I will never fight against war, but will certainly stand for peace.”

This is what surprised me….I’m a marketer. And a sales person. And I love those two things and embrace them. But trying so hard to convince myself (and ultimately you) that I’m NOT like person x is really not the best use of my energy.

So it got me thinking that while I always encourage you to be more of you and get that brilliance out in your business, there may be some under currents of not wanting to be something that is playing out.

Maybe you have the same story I do of not wanting to be seen in a negative light. Or maybe it’s just not owning something you should be owning for yourself.

Let’s dive a bit deeper and look at this one.

Mindset 101 – your beliefs are running your business (and life) and if you don’t make them conscious, it’s very often like you are sitting in the passenger seat and not driving in the direction you want to go.

Let’s just see how much ‘charge’ you have from some of these statements. Related to your business, you’ll want to fill in the blank:

“I would hate if people thought ___________________________ of me and the services I offer.”

“What I don’t want people to see about me is __________________________.”

“Secretly what I’m afraid about in my business is ______________________.”

“If my potential clients knew ___________________ about me, they might not sign up.”

Ok, kinda hard questions. But in order to make it through this entrepreneurial journey, you must be willing to do the deep dive into what’s really going on inside. Or you will be a victim to the unconscious drivers and motivation.

When you answered those, did you come up with much intensity? Meaning, if it’s a reasonable thing like “I’d hate if people think I am a fraud” and you felt relatively neutral with it, you are probably fine. We all have some degree of nature that wants to look good and have others approve of us. But if you had that same “Oh no…what if they thought I’m a fraud” and you noticed that it is a HUGE emotional reaction, very likely you are over-reacting and so holding back. Ask yourself these questions:

“How am I holding back?

“What am I NOT doing because of the fear?”

“What’s the cost of these thoughts in terms of me being able to market and sell myself?”

I want you to get real with yourself. Make this stuff conscious so you don’t have to have your mastermind partners show it to you! But actually, that’s the work I do with my clients day in and day out. Showing them the places where their mindset is not supporting them.

And I use tools like the WaveMaker, EFT, NLP, and the work of Byron Katie to help people shift this. But the first piece is awareness. You can’t change what you don’t know. So I’m going to challenge you to be on the look-out for anything you are running away from, giving energy to NOT being, and holding back out of fear.

This week watch you words. Notice your energy. See if you are a caped crusader for something and really look at what’s underneath that to see if it’s affecting your business or marketing in a negative manner. And know I’m here for you and want to help you get clear on what you own, and what you dump! Week two of the Blind Spot To Brilliance program is where we really dive into this Inner Game work. There are a few spots left, so check it out if you can see that you may need some mindset ‘massaging’ shall we say.

Peace and Blessings!