I’ve been sharing with you some common Mindset Traps that keep entrepreneurs from having a business that makes them happy and profitable.  Trap #1 was “I have to do it all myself” and Trap #2 was “People won’t pay higher fees.” You can click on the links above to read the first two posts in this series.

And now let’s look a little deeper and finish off our list…

#3 – Everyone already knows this
Oh, the dreaded, “What makes me so special” mindset trap. Just because things come easy to us or we do it naturally, we can’t believe that people would value it, or even need it. The key trap here is that you are undervaluing what you bring, thinking that since it’s so easy or natural for you, or maybe Tony Robbins talked about it on a tape years ago that what you offer is old news! Not true my friend…..But believing this will cause you to pull back, dim your light and not stand in the place of being the rock star that you are.

#4 –It needs to be perfect
Guess what…the folks who struggle with #1 almost always struggle with this one as well. I had a coach once who said these three magical words: DONE IS GOOD! Meaning, just get it done and out and refine later. But the mindset trap that we sometimes fall in is those little places where we don’t quite feel good enough on the inside, so if our stuff on the outside is perfect, then maybe no one will know. This isn’t to say that you should do schlocky work, but the trap here is that I see too many entrepreneurs holding their ideas back and refining, refining, and refining because secretly they are afraid it’s not good enough. The trap is that they think they are working on something, but the reality is that they are scared to get it out in the world. Next issue we’ll talk about what criteria to use to blast thru this monkey in your mind problem.

#5 – I don’t have enough _______ to make this a successful business
Oh, if I had a dollar for every time a client tried to justify their not being able to grow more because they didn’t have enough education, training, money, help, etc……

Mostly this trap comes from the underlying (and often unconscious belief) that we aren’t quite enough. This looks like the person who says, “If I just go to one more work shop, or read one more book, or follow so and so’s new blueprint, THEN I’ll be ok.” See the trap?

It’s like we are running on the hamster wheel, always going, but not getting anywhere because that bugger of “who I am isn’t good enough, so something outside of me will fix this.” I was shocked to hear that Ted Turner (the gazillionaire) never felt like his accomplishments were good enough. So he did more and more, purchased more and more, and then realized that inside this mogul was a scared little boy who really just wanted to please his dad, and he never could. By realizing that, he was able to stop the ‘chase’ of this feeling and finally just be content with what he had.

There ya go. Five mindset traps. And in the next weeks I’ll give you the solutions. In the meantime, feel free to post on my blog (http://www.happyinbusiness.com/blogfree-articles/) your comments and any additional traps you see.

Blessings,

Therese.

Life and business go hand and hand.  Very often as I experience things with my boys, I can see the patterns that my business owner clients also have as well.  This was really present for me when I took John, my almost 10 year old, to karate for the first time last week.

See, John is the kind of kid that wants to excel and is really hard on himself.  He’s dropped out of two sports when he can’t be the best, and has a tendency to be quite the little perfectionist.  Being the therapist-turned-coach-mom, I believe I know just what to tell him.  OK, maybe I don’t know exactly, but I’m gonna give it a shot.

After just one karate class, John decided that maybe  he wasn’t good enough.  He was anxious, and really had a very bad attitude about going back.  In fact, the old pattern of wanting to quit was emerging again.

But this time, I’m not letting him give up on himself.  Much like working with clients, I have a vision of what’s on the other side of the fear.  It’s my job to show John and my clients what’s possible if they will just persevere.

So the day of karate we were driving to school and John started in.  He went for a few minutes focusing on all the things he couldn’t do, how he’d probably be the worst in the class, blah, blah, blah.  This was a teachable moment….

I stopped him and said, “John, for three months, just give yourself permission to SUCK!”  He didn’t get it again, so I repeated it.  “John, just give yourself permission to be really bad for three months.”  This time, he looked at me like I had two heads, and said, “Hey mom, that’s not being very nice.”  He was taking it personally.

Clearly at nine, he didn’t get my loving support, so I had to explain it this way.

“You are working on learning something you have never done before.  If you give yourself three months and be totally gentle with yourself and only focus on what you do well, you’ll feel so much better about it.  Versus, the alternative of focusing on what you can’t do, getting frustrated, and wanting to quit.”  I went on to acknowledge how athletic he is, how disciplined he is, and how he could totally control what he chose to focus on….learning new skills or the mistakes he would make.  It was a pretty cool drive to school as I love teaching my boys ‘consciousness’ and that they have the power of choice.

Now in your business or life…where do you bump into the need to “allow yourself to suck for 90 days?”  It’s really an amazing little strategy I’ve developed from working with thousands of clients over the years.  Personally, I just started singing lessons, and it’s funny because my words to John came in very handy just three days later when I felt like I’d never master the breathing and complicated exercises the teacher was asking me to do.  But being older and wiser, I now know that the #1 most important thing I can do is to breathe, be gentle with myself, and keep showing up………it always gets better.

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